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Recap of 10/10/10 (Ephesians 4:30-32):
Issues in forgiveness (based in part on Lewis Smedes’, “Forgiveness – The Power to Change the Past:”
-Reckon that under God’s economy forgiveness is a better way than fairness (God doesn’t treat us as we deserve, He gives us grace instead). (Revenge never evens the score, mercy is better than revenge, forgiveness releases the forgiver from the unfairness).
-Take our grief to God, describing exactly how we feel, expressing our anger and grief.
-Forego the right to strike back or to continue the resentment.
-Ask God to give us the strength to forgive-to let go and trust again.
-Choose to forgive as an act of the will. This may have to be repeated as the pain takes time to heal. Choose to let go of the bitterness and desire for revenge.
-Replace feelings of resentment and anger with good will-a desire which seeks the other’s welfare not harm.
-Start over. Take steps to restore good relations, remembering that forgiving is not forgetting, excusing, or smoothing over. We only forgive when we acknowledge that we were wronged.
